Food Digest

This Missus whipped up a pretty fantastic pork chop dinner in a matter of minutes. I mean, one moment she was on the couch watching “Sister Act,” and the next moment we’re cutting into a juicy piece of pork with couscous and brussel sprouts on the side. Thanks, Whoopi Goldberg.

Late lunch — 2:45pm. Two slices bologna, one slice salami, two slices American cheese, toasted on wheat bread with a smear of Ranch dressing. Definitely was missing a key ingredient that could have made it, I don’t know, less boring. Maybe mustard? Could it be that simple? Very possibly.

For some idiotic reason, I decided to splurge on dinner. And this pile of sloppy leather-bites inside a halo of broccoli is what I got.

Went to Hunan Chef, in Northfield, Ill., for some Chinese food. Was initially going to get something cheap-o, like lo mein or cashew chicken, when the “crispy chicken” caught my eye on the menu. It sounded akin to my favorite dish at my favorite Chinatown restaurant — dry chili chicken from Double Li. Figured it wouldn’t be as good, but wanted to give it a shot.

FAIL. I mistakenly though Hunan Chef’s dish would be dry. It’s not. At least, not like Double Li’s. It’s coated with a not-spicy-at-all sauce. What IS dry is the actual chicken. Was sort of like chicken jerky in a goo. The only positive was that I ate some broccoli with my dinner, and broccoli is good for me.

This dish cost a whopping $13.25 on the menu. With tax, that totals $14.44. Since the place was completely empty, and the waiter was a nice dude, I left a $3 tip. Can you imagine? $17 for THIS? Oh, the humanity. To add insult to injury, I had to go BACK TO WORK after eating half the plate.

Luckily, the dog loves eating garbage, so she’ll love the leftovers.

Popped into Panera Bread in Skokie to make some phone calls and grab some free wifi. Oh, and to eat a roast beef sandwich and broccoli/cheddar soup. This lunch was almost late enough to call it an early dinner. Got plopped into a story mid-afternoon, so today felt more hectic than it actually was.

I’ll freely admit it: I bought a product based on an advertisement. I’m a big fan of Marc Maron’s WTF podcast, and the coffee hippies up in Wisconsin behind Just Coffee named a blend just for him. There’s something about the gravelly nature of Maron’s voice that makes me assume he ought to know a thing or two about good coffee. So I bought a bag, and tossed some beans this morning into the grinder.

I’m not a huge coffee guy, but it’s definitely got a dark flavor to it, which I like. Just Coffee says it has “rich hints of brandy and vanilla.” I guess. And I’m not going to argue with them that these beans were grown in the Honduras shade. It tastes like good, dark coffee. I’m happy with it. To quote Maron: “Pow. I just shit my pants.”

A pile o’ pizza. Leftovers from Friday night’s solo-feast. (And three leftover boneless hot wings, which are essentially just chicken nuggets, right? Who is Pizza Hut kidding?) I’m here to tell you, the “wings” don’t age as well as the pizza.